Ironically, self-publishing my book this year was one of the least consequential things that happened in my life in 2025. I took the day today to reflect on the major life changes that I’ve effected this year:
I moved out of downtown LA, back to the Valley, buying a condo in a 12-unit building in Toluca Lake filled with lovely and neighborly folks. I promptly joined the co-op board, something I’d avoided in my previous building of 200 units for over 15 years. And my condo building is two buildings away from my big brother Don and his wife Terry, which has been very entertaining and useful positioning. Terry and I will be going to see Lady Gaga on February 18th! That’s something new for me!
I sold my DTLA eleventh story north facing aerie which was perfectly located for a quick commuting time to USC, while I was working. When our family had moved to that condo from the valley, I remember calculating how much time I’d save on the commute, and indeed, it afforded us much more time to attend the theater or just enjoy each other. This past weekend, I went downtown, connecting with my friend, Rob, and we walked around the Pershing Square area, visiting Pitchoun!, the French Patisserie on Olive at Pershing Square, then walked through the Square to see the ice skaters before visiting my old neighbors whose business, Define Diamond, is in the Jewelry Mart building downtown. I’m happy to have friends downtown so I can still visit.
I moved into my new place on Valentine’s Day, February 14, 2025, with much help from my brother Don and friend, Leah. I unpacked like a maniac to get settled because my knee replacement surgery was scheduled for 2/26/25. I got all the boxes unpacked and was pretty well settled (no pictures on the wall) by the time my friend Caroline arrived to help me with the surgery for a week. It went very smoothly, thanks to her support. Later in July, I fulfilled our pact with each other by travelling to Greensboro, NC to help her with her knee replacement surgery. It was wonderful to see her daughter and to witness their lives a little while she recovered from the surgery. Interesting, too, to see the different protocols and PT regimens. I’m happy to say we are both recovering well.
In the middle of PT and continuing to settle, I finished and self-published my book, “My Heart In My Mouth: Finding the Next Words” and thereafter backed into a writer’s block the size of the beautiful Robert Vargas mural in Pershing Square (above). I am looking hard at the reasons for my hopefully temporary discontinuation of writing. I think I spent so many years navel gazing to write the book, while also writing my blog that it feels like there’s no more lint to pick, or worse, picking lint seems frivolous in these trying political times.
I stayed politically engaged all year, following closely the writings of Simon Rosenburg of The Hopium Chronicles, The Meidas Touch team, Heather Cox Richardson’s Letters from an American, taking solace in the group zooms where Simon brought us up to speed on the catastrophes unfolding in the Administration. Participation in my regular volunteer work at the LA Regional Food Bank gave me a solid base for doing something practical and a great group of folks to get to know and bond with politically. We accomplished a lot in the two No Kings Rallies and I’m excited to learn about the various marches we will participated in 2026, an election year.
My Dad lost his wife of thirty-four years in August at the age of ninety-nine, and we undertook a somewhat turbo-charged transition for him to Los Angeles where he has joined a wonderful retirement community. It means that much of our nuclear family can gather and see each other throughout the week. I’ve attended the theater with Dad, and we dine frequently at his community. I participate occasionally in his community’s events – Tuesday night Charades is my favorite. He has resumed his golfing with my brother Don and occasional friends and family who have visited. We miss his beautiful wife terribly but went to DC to celebrate her life in a spectacular event produced by her children on her 100th birthday. Following that trip, Dad and I visited his sister and her family in Florida for about five days before returning to California.
I remained connected with my old friends and strengthened relationships with friends and family. I had two visits from my son and his family in March and in August and was able to spend Thanksgiving with them up in Tahoe.
The many theatre outings and dance and music concerts with friends enriched my life and raised my spirits all year long. Visits from Terry’s mom and brother Brett, my brother Larry and Barbara, and my cousin PC and his family were highpoints this fall.
Just when I thought I was past the acquisition phase of my life, I had the opportunity to acquire two new major pieces of art to my collection, a painting called Flower Drag by Niki Ford, which hangs directly behind my back while I’m writing and when I’m engaged in zoom meetings, I’m so proud to see it there. The other painting, Songs of Summer, (the yellow painting above) by my aunt Irene Neal, is still in Merritt Island, FL. I’m currently arranging for its shipment to LA.
I’ve been thinking a lot about the volume of work I did as a professor and producer of student plays. We produced about twenty plays a school year, each with casting, rehearsal, tech and performances, and yet, I was still able to carry my responsibilities at home and see friends and attend the theater frequently. Now, as a retired person, I find my productivity/creativity severely diminished. The adage, “give the job to the busiest person to do” rings true. I was discussing this creative flagging with another retired friend recently and she suggested that the work we did in the theatre always came with both literal and figurative applause when we achieved openings, etc. The mundanities of life work lacks recognition or acclaim. I’m trying to come up with ways to gin up that sense of accomplishment and hope to do better with that in 2026. And no, that’s not returning to work full time.
I’ve had my fair share of health challenges in the last few years and like to think that with almost two years of clear checkups I am beyond the unhealthful phase of my life. I’ve joined the gym and am working with a personal trainer who has shown me how to use all the equipment at 24-hour Fitness, and I’ve built a routine that I believe I will continue with because I like it and feel so good after I do it. Being retired affords me the seventy-five to ninety minutes I need to really make a difference three or four times a week. Walking with my new knee is much easier, and I’ve been doing monthly hikes with my former colleagues from USC, usually organized by one of my former colleagues from the purchasing office at USC. We finish our hikes with a delicious breakfast or lunch in some place near the hiking spot. It’s a terrific way to connect. Some of our hike pix from 2025.
Will I ever write substantially again? I resolve to get motivated to write and to promote my book. Self-publishing is tricky and getting services you’ve paid for seems to be up to you. I am in the process of recording my audio book. I’ve rented a sound studio in North Hollywood next Monday to get started for real. The walk-in closet in my new condo doesn’t really cut it for good sound quality. Wish me luck.
Resolutions? Sure, the usual ones – eat healthfully, exercise, engage in the artistic and political communities, find a topic worth writing about, travel (this summer promises a long trip to Italy), take cooking more seriously, and send Christmas cards or New Year’s next year. And above all, embrace the friends and family I’m so fortunate to have. Wishing you a happy and healthy 2026!
lifeinthethe8tre 