In the Clear

The past three weeks have been eventful. My first day back at work on March 1, 2024, began with labs at Keck, followed by the critical appointment with my oncologist, Dr. C, to reveal the results of the three CT scans she had ordered to determine if the chemo treatments were effective.

You can imagine my nerves about receiving the results. I asked my brother Don to drive me there and to listen in the room, as I didn’t trust that I would be able to listen if there were unexpected bad news. Don wisely suggested I record the meeting, which Dr. C was fine with.

Cut to the chase, Els – the news is good. There was no evidence of cancer from the scans taken. As my doctor had predicted, with the full removal of the mass and no evidence in nearby lymphnodes, the chemo had been the clean up hitter. Don drove me home, both of us giddy with elation that the chapter of Cancer was behind me.

I attended a series of staff and faculty meetings that day where I shared my good news with my colleagues and the day was a barrage of good wishes via my cell phone and in person as the closest friends appeared at my door for long sustained hugs. I was so grateful for the waiting and uncertainty to be over.

I had a lunch with the Sages of CTG, a group of stage managers, publicists, costume shop managers from the Gordon Davidson era at Center Theatre Group. Our picture is above. What a beautiful group of women and I’m so happy to count them among my friends.

Being back at work has been engaging. The new Dramatic Arts Building is beautiful. These beautiful images by University Photographer Gus Ruelo took and we are so grateful!

The DAB denizens, faculty, students and staff, are all wandering around with perpetual grins on our faces. Just my office itself is a treat, with it’s standing desk, and beautiful windows overlooking the campus west of the new Dramatic Arts Building. I’d settled in with my minimal belongings (no point in deep rooting anything for 8 weeks) and enjoyed meeting with students for mentoring meetings in the plummy guest chairs. There’s an irony to ending my 19 plus years with minimal duties aside from Co-Production Managing six undergraduate shows with my Alumnus colleague, Simon Chau. I have had the pleasure of seeing his fully-developed PMing skills at work. It has been a great collaboration, and so gratifying to hear about his work as a sub ASM on major touring shows in Los Angeles.

Out in the world, I’ve been attending plays and dinners with friends. I intended to write this post weeks ago to ensure you got to see Stew at Ebony Repertory Theatre. What a beautiful production. For some reason, I’ve found this post a hard one to get out the door. I don’t know if it’s the relief about the cancer journey, or the tiredness from going back to work, or the uncertainty of what is yet to come, but all seem to have conspired to slow my writer’s brain. A brief but hearty case of the flu definitely slowed me down in there, too. It makes me wonder when the immunity to such banal things returns.

My friends are consoling – “don’t try to figure out what comes next when you are still finishing up the current chapter.” Sage counsel but once a multi-tasker, always a multi-tasker. I’m just looking forward to PMing the next shows, and ultimately to the May 1st retirement event that will signal the last ten days as a college Professor. My retreat to Costa Rica got cancelled – not enough people signed up, but that’s okay. I have a longer term look at travel and introspection. I will replace that trip with a trip to Florida with my Dad to visit his “little sister.”

I’m getting back to my walks with more regularity. An injection of gel into my left knee cap has made the arthritis in my knee more manageable. I start PT this week which I’m hoping will make me more mobile and able to continue with more frequent walks. I’m reading Peter Attia’s book Outlive: The Science & Art of Longevity which is a sobering reminder that what we want to look forward to – our health span, or how actively and well we live our later years is built upon increasing our exercise regime in younger decades. He refers to the centarian decathalon as those things we want to be able to do in our 90s or 100s. Modest things like carry two five pound bags of groceries five blocks, being able to walk up a hill, etc. All of those goals need to be planned for and achieved in the decades before. Time to start, y’all!

What will the future bring for me? Who knows? If yesterday was any indicator, I spent the whole day reading the papers and doing crossword puzzles and acrostics. Took me right back to the early days of my marriage, where we would find ourselves in luxurious entropy, sharing the puzzle – you do five, I’ll do five. Why are you making such bold guesses on the Acrostic? Bliss.

That and eventful afternoons celebrating the accomplishments of many others who grace my life with their writing and being in the world. I celebrated with other St. Paul’s Alumni and Yalies the book We Should Not Be Friends by Will Schwalbe at Zibby’s Bookstore in Santa Monica. Interviewed by author Rufi Thorpe, author of The Knockout Queen and upcoming release Margo’s Got Money Troubles gave me three new books to read along with Blank by Zibby Owens. I had read Will’s books months ago (or had him read it to me, which was a lovely passage of time) so was familiar with the passages that Rufi so lovingly invoked. Will’s gentle instruction at the end of the talk to engage with others about what they are reading is a reminder that we can bridge differences with others by sharing the life of our minds.

Being patient with my planning genes and not getting too far ahead with what comes next to allow things to present themself as possibilities. In the mean time, I’m busy finding lots of ways to fill time and spending the remaining weeks with my colleagues and students.