I happened to come across something I wrote about two years ago about a difficult time in my son’s life, and hence in ours. It was really heartbreaking to read what he was going through at the time.
I was sending him some mail and tucked the three pages of pain into the envelope with his new car insurance cards and some bank statements that had come in the past few days.
I jotted down a note to him commenting on how far he/we had come in the past few years and how proud of him his Dad and I are. That’s it. Just a simple reminder that we are there to watch and support and love him, and how much we missed him right now.
He and I have been knocking around the idea of a book about his wild ride through life. I sent this to my co-writer today because it might well be important to that writing we are exploring together.
When I was younger, some of the adages I heard stuck with me. They were:
1) Blood is thicker than prune juice.
2) Keep a stiff upper lip (or as I liked to bastardize it, Keep a lip upper stiff)
3) This too shall pass.
Not too long ago, Chris remarked that the last one was one which had really stuck with him, and that regardless of how horrific things seemed at any given time (and they were pretty bad at times), he always returned to that phrase and took comfort from it.
As I read the painful account of this past time, I took comfort in the truth of that statement. This too shall pass. It has already and it will again.
I remember a time about 6 years ago when we decided to sell our house in the valley and move to downtown LA so that I could be closer to my work. At the same time, my husband got cast in the National tour of “Twelve Angry Men” and was slated to be gone on the road for 6 weeks. Our moving date was May 1, and to top it all off, we like to joke at USC School of Dramatic Arts that “April is the cruelest month.” It is because we open 8 shows in the month of April. It is without a doubt, the busiest time of the year.
Chris was finishing high school and didn’t want to move down to downtown in the middle of the school year, so at the very generous offer from his friend’s parents, we allowed him to stay for that final month with his friend Justin and his family in the Valley so that he could continue at his high school.
With my husband out of town, a 17 year old teenager with many better things to do than help me pack boxes, and 8 shows opening in the month of April, things were a bit hectic. Plus, we were downsizing as well, from 2575 sq. ft. to 1193 in the new place. This meant yard sales and donations of boxes of books to the library, etc. It was really nutso.
But looking back on that time, I realize that it passed as well. No one died, and we got into our new house, Chris graduated from High School, and Jimmie finished his tour and returned to our new home where we were all reunited.
This too shall pass. It is my mantra. It works.